We're the Apostates of Hate system! (referencing Gabriel from ULTRAKILL because he's one of the host's sources, hence that also being his name). I don't know if we have P-DID or OSDD-1b I honestly can't be fucking assed to figure it out anymore but we have a dissociative disorder of some kind. We have a lot of alters (like way too fucking many where did all of you come from) but the ones who front the most frequently or at least play a significant role in us being able to function are listed here. We're collectively transmasc and nonbinary/multigendered, and if you're referring to us as a collective please call us Gabriel and use he/him pronouns!
We can barely tell who we are most of the time because we blend together a lot and are frequently co-conscious. We function better as parts of a whole rather than as entirely seperate individuals. We're fine with being treated as/referred to as seperate people but we're still all living the same life and piloting the same body at the end of the day.
This site is primarily run by our host (Gabriel/Painty) but we thought it'd be fun to let our headmates have their own personal pages and mess around with HTML/CSS.
We'd prefer if endogenics (people who believe themselves to be systems without any trauma or dissociative symptoms) didn't engage with us. We're not here to tell anyone about what's going on in their own brain, we're just deeply uncomfortable with those people and how much misinformation there is out there surrounding systems because of them (not to mention how frequently ableist many of them are towards dissociative systems). Respect our boundaries and don't directly involve us in any discourse, please and thank you!
Still a work-in-progress.... come back later!
Still a work-in-progress.... come back later!
Notepad
for us to quickly write random thoughts down. this is tucked away in the system page because it's for the entire collective to use and also because we might get insane here. this is basically a microblog. nothing here is gonna be marked with a trigger warning if it contains heavy topics lol
Entries
OZZY (11/4/2025, 12:01 PM): i hate science class so much dawg this is the most useless fucking class for us
THREE (10/31/2025, 8:54 PM): wyd when you nearly get suspended because a dumbass teacher thinks the bagel you're eating is your phone
THREE (10/30/2025, 9:02 AM): we're watching The Crucible in history class and i Highkey wanna vomit oh my god
THREE (10/30/2025, 8:23 AM): why do WE need to be open minded to people that never want to be open minded to us and refuse to let go of their narrow ass worldview
THREE (10/29/2025, 9:20 PM): you cannot fucking tell me that saying you're "going insane because you live with a bunch of females" doesn't sound misogynistic as fuck like please don't piss me off
THREE (10/29/2025, 9:02 PM): i fucking HAAAAAATE our sister dude our dad just said some of the most blatantly misogynistic shit ever and she's fucking telling me that i'm a miserable and angry person because i said that shit was misogynistic. like we cant say shit to these people we can never point out ANYTHING they fucking say or do that's wrong because we're always the problem im so fucking done. you guys can go be ignorant and closed-minded and unwilling to see the error in the way you people think far away from us thanks!
THREE (10/29/2025, 2:38 PM): we should honestly switch clubs ts is boring as hell and none of the cool people we like are in it
THREE (10/29/2025, 2:34 PM): i think it's dumb that clubs replace our 8th period electives on wednesdays i think they should just have the clubs be during lunch everyday but honestly we'd probably go insane from having to be in a classroom with these kids everyday. i miss you fashion design (we have that class every other day of the week)
THREE (10/29/2025, 2:28 PM): the kids in the art club are so fucking annoying help
.png)
Start
